Asshattery, cont’d
November 5, 2007
Despite my intention to live vicariously through your fantastic suggestions for the Mix Tape note but not do anything, there was an unexpected resolution to the matter last Tuesday night.
10pm: I come home from class, after babbling at Terry for the entire trip from Boston (thanks Terry!), to find Xifey sitting at the dining room table playing on her laptop. And right in the middle of the table is the Mix Tape#4 note.
STILL on my dining room table! A full 15 hours after I found it, and 13 hours after I asked Xifey to hide her love letters (a small request, me thinks). So I …
Put my bag down
Walk calmly into the kitchen
Grab the wok
Walk back into the dining room
Place the wok on the table
Pick up the note
Stick the corner of note into the candle flame
Watch carefully as it ignites, and
Drop it in the wok.
Xifey: “Are you f*@^ing crazy?”
Mafia: “Nah. It’s a piece of paper, safely burning away in a wok. It’s not like I set the house on fire.”
Xifey: “I’m outta here!”
Stay tuned for a prize announcement on Monday. There are so many good ones that I’m having a really hard time making a decision!
Entry Filed under: Contest, Divorce, Dykalicious, Xifey. .
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1.
morganna | November 5, 2007 at 1:07 am
you go, girl - nicely done.
2.
ErickaJo | November 5, 2007 at 1:11 am
Wow, I found that satisfying and I wasn’t even there!
3.
Mel | November 5, 2007 at 1:17 am
I hope she meant that part about being outta there. Well done, you.
4.
Mary | November 5, 2007 at 1:23 am
Awesome!!
5.
Sparkles | November 5, 2007 at 1:37 am
You are my hero.
Good on you for not taking that shit.
6.
roro | November 5, 2007 at 2:17 am
I think YOU should get the prize. BRILLIANT! Also, satisfying.
7.
maryse | November 5, 2007 at 6:26 am
heh heh heh
8.
heather | November 5, 2007 at 7:49 am
Bravo!
9.
Manise | November 5, 2007 at 7:57 am
Ha! Perfectly executed. And for the record, you are not effing crazy. That would be reserved for her.
10.
Suzanne | November 5, 2007 at 8:14 am
You *can* have your cake and eat it, too. You have the record of the thing (Exhibit A) and also the pleasure of seeing it go up in flames. Kindling would have ensured complete combustion, but would have seriously decreased the spontaneity.
11.
caro | November 5, 2007 at 8:43 am
Nicely done!
12.
PumpkinMama | November 5, 2007 at 8:45 am
I think you found a good balance between maturity and retribution. I do hope that provided some satisfaction!
13.
Lisa | November 5, 2007 at 9:10 am
BRAVO!
14.
Lucy | November 5, 2007 at 9:14 am
Classily done! Calm yet surprising enough to make her think twice about continuing to childishly rub your nose in her affair.
15.
leah | November 5, 2007 at 9:53 am
niiiice one.
16.
Kathode Ray Tube | November 5, 2007 at 11:02 am
Very impressive, destructive and controlled all at the same time. Maybe next time, she will listen to your request to put the f(#*@@ing note away??
17.
Martha | November 5, 2007 at 11:07 am
You made my day! Awesome. Good for you.
18.
Kat | November 5, 2007 at 11:20 am
Good for you!!
19.
melanie | November 5, 2007 at 11:25 am
That was awesome. Yet still dignified. You did ask her to remove it first.
Man I bet that felt great!
20.
megan | November 5, 2007 at 12:17 pm
Rock on! Best action ever in the face of complete asshattery.
21.
Kate | November 5, 2007 at 12:44 pm
Go you!
22.
Engranon | November 5, 2007 at 12:57 pm
And the winner is…. YOU! That was absolutely excellent.
23.
margene | November 5, 2007 at 1:12 pm
Very good…you should still make a CD for her and make sure you add Ain’t No Need to be Pissin’ on a Skunk by the Uppity Blues Women!
24.
Alex | November 5, 2007 at 1:13 pm
Crazy?! I think you were remarkably restrained! Well done. Perhaps now she’ll think twice about such immature and stupid behavior.
25.
Thorn | November 5, 2007 at 2:18 pm
Whoo! Good on ya!
Very nicely done. And a timely reminder that no matter how old we may grow, if we leave our possessions out where they do not belong, then we must accept partial responsibility if they are destroyed by toddlers, pets, or exes.
26.
Dorothy | November 5, 2007 at 2:44 pm
The perfect thing to do in that situation. She could be a little more considerate and maybe that’ll learn her.
27.
mote | November 5, 2007 at 3:17 pm
Rock on. Fire is catharsis, and no one deserves to enact a little catharsis more than you do, imho…
28.
Sara | November 5, 2007 at 3:38 pm
whoo hoo - you go!
29.
Ruth | November 5, 2007 at 3:38 pm
You, my dear, ROCK.
30.
Jenn | November 5, 2007 at 5:10 pm
That’s fucking awesome. Good for you.
31.
Sitcomgirl | November 5, 2007 at 10:03 pm
That was awesome! I bet it felt great, and really not unreasonable
I hope she really is out. Or at least she learns her lesson in not trying to play the “hi be jealous” game.
32.
Rhonda the Stitchingnut | November 7, 2007 at 12:54 pm
What’s the matter with that woman? And she thinks you’re crazy? She’s obviously living in a world of her own. I’m impressed with you, Mafia for handling it so well and taking the time to think of the wok for “safety”. Hope the burning felt good.
33.
Carrie | November 9, 2007 at 7:44 pm
Rock on! I think that was the perfect way to get your point across!
34.
Judy | November 13, 2007 at 12:38 pm
O !
Just coming out from under my own unbearably heavy rock.
But this shit is crazy.
35.
Won Serious Badass «&hellip | November 19, 2007 at 2:04 am
[...] in some therapeutic fantasizing. I didn’t intend to do anything. Really, I didn’t. But I was pushed too far. Again. And regarding being pushed too far, let us never discuss my birthday. Fun times at Chez [...]
36.
LadyDragonTear | December 19, 2007 at 1:47 pm
I figure this is better late than never. I would have burned the note in a pot, taken a screwdriver and opened up her laptop and spread the ashes all over her motherboard, CPU fan etc. Then of course close the computer back up and act like nothing happened. I would never have the guts to do this, and I’m pretty sure its illegal, but I would love to see the outcome!!!!
Either way hurrah for you!!! Well done!!!